Here's an idea!

I have been wondering about things that I could write about. I know God is trying to get to me right now and again, being too wrapped up in my stuff, I can't hear him. Do you ever feel like that?

Anyway, I love to watch movies. I love to read reviews of movies. I love to hear other peoples ideas about movie reviews. I know that when I read the reviewer in the Star Telegram Friday pull out section, I generally don't agree. They usually think it sucks and when I watch it, I enjoy it. That being said, Gary Cogil on ABC local, he is usually right on. I can watch him and know that when I see the movie, I will usually agree with what he has to say. So, me, being the ever so opinionated person I am....not....I am going to review movies on my blog when I see them. Now don't be afraid, I don't go to that many movies, so it shouldn't be too many for you! But, I do like to pay per view them! I mostly watch kiddo movies with the girls, so I may review some of them too.

When I review the movie, I will put "Review: Name of movie" in my title section so you won't have to read it if you don't want to. If you would like me to review one for you, you can email me the name of the movie and I will try to check it out. Don't worry, the service will be free. :-)
Also, when I read a book, I may review that too. I have really started reading a lot lately. I try to read one fiction then a non fiction. I am on a fiction one right now.
Anyway, I am excited about this venture. If it goes well, I may try to get some reviews into the newspaper somewhere. Hehe...Trying to be the Roaring Lamb that God needs me to be!

Let me know what you think about my idea. I have some others, but I am going to start with this one.

Until we read again! wt

Ponderings from a forwarded email...

I just read this great email called, "God's Busy". I have added it with my thoughts afterward...Read on:

A United States Marine was attending some college courses between assignments. He had completed missions in Iraq andAfghanistan. One of the courses had a professor who was an avowed atheist and a member of the ACLU.
One day the professor shocked the class when he came in He looked to the ceiling and flatly stated, "God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform, I'll give you exactly 15 minutes." The lecture room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop. Ten minutes went by and the professor proclaimed, "Here I am God, I'm still waiting." It got down to the last couple of minutes when the Marine got out of his chair, went up to the professor, and cold-cocked him; knocking him off the platform. The professor was out cold. The Marine went back to his seat and sat there, silently. The other students were shocked and stunned and sat there looking on in silence.
The professor eventually came to, noticeably shaken, looked at the Marine and asked, "What the heck is the matter with you?" "Why did you do that?"
The Marine calmly replied, "God was too busy today protecting America's soldiers who are protecting your right to say stupid stuff and act like an idiot, So, He sent me."

First off, how totally cool is that? I hope it is true. I think sometimes people need God to knock them out. I know I need to be reminded on occasion. (I am glad He hasn't hit me yet...) On the other hand, how many times has God sent you to take care of His business and you were too busy taking care of your own? I believe as a culture in todays times, we are way too busy. We keep our schedules cluttered. We keep our minds filled with what we saw on TV last night, what we have to do next or who did what to who last night. We keep our childrens lives filled with music practice, softball practice, gymnastics, computer games, television, you name it. What happened to slowing down and taking a moment to listen to what God has to say. Yesterday at church, Blake (our youth pastor) preached on this very subject. He talked about how we need to take time for God. Even God knew when to rest after a busy week. (See the Creation story in the first book of the Bible) He spent a whole day resting. We always talk the big talk, about how we are going to start doing it, but I challenge you to follow through and walk the big walk. I bet if we started slowing down and resting, we would be a lot more open to God's will for our lives. Maybe he has someone we need to knock out for him, but we can't hear him because we are so busy. Maybe He has something for our kids to help Him with, but we have them so busy, they can't hear Him either??? The question is, will they figure it out before they go deaf? Let's stop and get our boxing gloves ready and see what happens next!

Gone into the Light...

Once upon a time I was me. It seemed like a long time ago, but praise to God, I am new today. I went to a retreat a few weeks ago hoping for a change. I say hoping because that is what I was doing, hoping. Not praying. I knew that others had come through it and they had been changed and I wanted change too. (see post below called Letting Go). Anyway, I wanted to be made whole again so that I could see Gods miracles and blessings in my life. I knew that I was being held back because of things that I continued to hang onto in my magical backpack that no one but me and God knew was there. I would say they were gone, but they weren't. They were just pushed deeper so I could keep on pretending. God knew though. He knew that He had blessings waiting for me and He stood there, arms crossed, toe tapping, eyes rolling saying, "C'mon Wendy, quit talking and start doing. I have a bagful of blessings piling up here..." Can you see Him? He is probably doing it to you too.
During our retreat, we heard about the things in the dark that we do and hold onto that keep us out of the light, (hence the name Marvelous Light.) We heard about bondage and things of the occult, (which is more than you would have thought). We heard about legalism and idolatry. Most of all we heard about forgiveness. One of my dear friends and I have talked a lot about that in the past. She is very wise. She had given me some of her story but at the retreat, she gave all of it. When she talked about her story in full, it filled in the rest of the blanks for me and I got it. I understood all that she had said to me and more. She helped a lot of people that weekend. At that moment I realized that the biggest thing holding me back from receiving the full blessings of God was the spirit of unforgiveness. I realized that I said I forgave but I just called it something else. I pointed fingers at other things. "Well, they made the bad decisions, they are not humble, they sure do have issues!" In reality, all those things are true, but because of my unforgiveness, I harbored anger and resentment. Those two things alone are enough to drive you insane when your mind starts thinking about it. Your stomach starts to boil, your blood starts to rush, your head feels heavy and before you know it you are taking it out on everyone around you who loves you. Then the ball starts rolling, they take it out on the people around them and around them and around them.... No wonder there are so many angry people.
But for me, NO MORE. I refuse to let Satan take my joy away anymore. I refuse to let Satan take my blessings away anymore. I know that I was changed at the retreat because I had an opportunity this weekend to let the anger retake control. I did not do it. I was faced with the one thing that would get me seething mad and I did not bite. Instead, I chose to remain calm. My stomach did not start to boil, my blood did not start to rush, my head did not feel heavy. I was completely and irrefutably unaffected. Even when I realized nothing was happening, I still was unaffected. Even when the disscussion heated, I still remained calm. At that moment, I knew that my prayers at that retreat with the 2 other women in my triad were heard and delivered upon. I knew that that burden in my magical backpack was gone. I knew that God had answered my call to take them away from me. Wow, what a freedom I have received! I have been blessed beyond meausure since then. The most recent was last night. No, it wasn't money or anything like that but it was something that I heard on TV. Had I walked into the room at any other moment, I might have missed it. I had a double header last night with our church softball team. After I played another terrible game with no hits in either game and wanted to quit playing altogether because I was so frustrated, I came home to hear Joel Osteen preaching on the television. He said that people are always trying to do things to impress other people. He said that God gives us certain things to be good at and when we venture out of those things and get frustrated we end up wasting our energy. He said we should be impressing ourselves with the things God gifted us with. I know that can be taken several ways, but last night, at that moment, I realized that at some point, I wanted to be really good at something that I maybe was not so good at. I had lost the fun and was trying too hard. My entire family was extremely good at softball and baseball. My Grandpa was going to play in the minors after the Korean war, but because of an injury, he did not get to. My mom was All-Star in high school. My dad did not get to play till he was older due to a heart condition, but he was good too. So at that moment, when I heard those words, I believe that God was giving me a blessing saying that it was okay to be not so good at softball because I am great at other stuff that He wants me to be great at. Isn't that the most important? So, when I play softball and yes, I will play again, I just need to have fun and bring the joy back in my game and play for me because it's fun and not everyone else because I want people to think I am good. Now, had I not gone through and reached into Marvelous Light that awesome November day, I don't know that I would have heard the blessing. People wonder if you can hear God talking to you and I say yes, you just have to be listening...

Softball blunders

Okay, so last night we had another CJ softball game. I got to play second base for the first time. I usually play catcher. I had a terrible game last night. I missed more than one ball. Here's one picture of my game, have you ever have one of those moments where it's like time slows down? Well, I missed the ball, lost my balance and hit the ground. I remember looking up, shocked that I missed it, because I was so sure I wasn't going to. I realized that everyone was looking at me and was pulled back to reality by yelling to get the ball because it was still in play. Hello, the game is still going. The winning run scored and the game was over. Let me top it off for you. I hit the ball terrible last night too. I had one more at bat and I had gone over it a million times while sitting on the bench. I get up to bat and smack it hard over the shortstops head. Whew hew! I take off to run, bam, tripped in the hole on the other side of the plate, do a somersault roll over my right shoulder, get up, still sure that I was going to make it to first because it was a perfect hit between the left fielder and shortstop.....that is, if the left fielder was playing where he was supposed to, but alas, he wasn't and caught it. I was out. I was dirty, blood dripping down my knee, dirt pouring out my ear, esteem in the gutter, out. On the bright side though, I did however get a chance to redeem myself to myself. Another team needed a girl to play and I offered to help. I played with people I did not even know. I had 2 great hits and helped them win the game, which they had not done yet. I knew I could do it, even with no one watching. I love to play softball.

Letting go

This past week, I went to the doctor for a sinus infection. I needed some medicine. I chose to take my SHAPE book with me. It is about finding and fulfilling your unique purpose for life. It is a follow up to the Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren. If you haven't read that one, you should. Anyway, I had read halfway through the SHAPE book, then decided to finish another book before moving on into the deep part. I read through the first chapter of the second half call "Letting Go". It was quite moving and realized that I could not just read this part of the book, I had to do the writing part too, in order to get the most out of it. While waiting for the doctor in the back, I started the chapter over and worked through it. It was quite thought provoking. I thought through a whole bunch of things that I needed to think through. I would like to take this opportunity to follow through with what I wrote in a prayer to God to help me Let Go.

Dear God,

Today I'm fully surrendering my life to you. I realize that I have been holding things back from you, for which I am sorry. Please take from me all of the things I have listed below and give me the rest that your Word promises. In addition, give me the strength and wisdom to live surrendered everyday of my life.
God I surrender the following to you today....

My Worries -
-My whole family including myself
-Health issues in my whole family including myself
-Money

My Wounds
-Never feeling good enough for my dad, always feeling like I had to prove
myself, actually, to everyone, not just dad.
-Marie's bad choices and how they have affected everyone.

My Wrongs
-To Miranda- I don't give her the same leeway that I give to Jessica. I think I do it because I am trying to make her a better person, but I don't know if that is totally true or not. I know it is partly, but I don't know that I don't take out some of my resentment from Marie on her. That obviously is a wrong to Miranda.
-I yell at people when I am angry. I should memorize James 1:19-20.
-I hold resentment in my heart towards Marie for her bad choices.
-I hold resentment in my heart towards Melysa for being not being grateful for the things that she has been given.

My Weaknesses
-Organizational skills in my home
-Patience in everything
-My fear of failure or letting people down
-Stepping out of my comfort zone to talk to new people

My Wishes
I wish that I would be a better mom to my girls.
I wish I had more patience.
I wish that I could make the difference in the lives of abused and neglected children.
I wish that when I die people will remember me as a loving mom, wife and child of God who made a difference in their lives.

Lord, today I have realized that in order to be fully yours, I need to surrender everything to you. Not just part of it, but all of it. You tell me that I can trust you with it all and you will take care of me and I will hold your Word close to me and believe that. Lord, today, I thank you for taking these burdens from me. Lord, when I am tempted to take them back, please remind me swiftly and lovingly that you have them for me. I thank you for all the blessings that you have given me and continue to give me. I thank you that you gave your son for me so I could be reunited with you in heaven on your golden streets.
Thank you Lord for all you are, all you have done and all you will do,

Amen.

Free isn't so free

I took all my girls to school today. 4 hours on Tuesdays and Thursdays, I am free of children. Peace. No one screaming in my ear that someone hit her or spit at her or isn't being fair or won't stay out of my room! Whew. I look forward to it, I earned it. I was walking through Walmart today, alone. It was a different experience. Have you ever done it? You should try it if you haven't. I was walking calming, looking at everything. If I wanted to stop and look at something I did. I was on my way to the checkout line and realized I forgot something on the other side of the store. Of course, it happens all the time. Now my first instinct was to go ahead and checkout, because I was almost done and the checkouts were right there, there was one open and I can just put the item back on the list for next time I go to the store. I stopped in my tracks. I did not have any kids and I did not have to rush home for any reason. Well then, that is a new feeling! Guess what I did, walked to the other side of the store, found my item, gently placed it in my cart and walked back to the other side of the store to again, ready myself for check out. Smiling all the way while I looky loo'd. I slowly did the self check out and put everything exactly where I wanted it. I got my receipt and proceeded toward the door. I then realized that I could carry the 4 bags in my hands and did not have to take the cart out today. I gave the cart to the greeter at the door, she smiled and said, "Thank you, have a great day!" I smiled back and said, "Thank you! You too!" Then I casually went on my way out the door.

On my way out to the van it hit me. In 2 years, at this time, all my girls will be in school. All day, every day school. Wow. What the heck will I do all day, everyday? Miss my girls, I will miss them. Catie right now is 8 and she already doesn't want to kiss me goodbye anymore. She blows me kisses and occasionally she will play catch up and give me hugs and kisses for all the days she didn't actually do it. What will it be like when all 3 of them are "too big" to do it? What will it be like when we are not the most important people anymore. It seems like for all the times I say, "Whew, some freedom and quiet time", there will be so many more when I say, "Whew, I sure miss my little girls screaming in my ear that someone hit her or spit at her or isn't being fair or won't stay out of my room!" God bless them and thank you Lord for showing me that today, just at the right time.

Awesome day!

Besides the usual to and fro for school and stuff, I did my stationary bike again for 30 minutes. I did it a couple of days ago too, but have not had a chance to blog about it. It has been an emotionally draining week due to family issues. I have to get past it though because I don't have control, only God does.

Anyway, we had our first practice for softball last night (my church team) and it rocked. Not everyone was there, but I always look forward to the fellowship with everyone and last night was no different. I was so excited because I got to hit the ball last night. I have been really practicing in my head and have gone to the batting cages a couple of times and it paid off. I hit the ball last night and actually made it out of the infield! Yea! It felt good too. The first season I sucked at hitting and catching. Last season I sucked at hitting, but my catching had improved. This season, my catching is a little rusty, but I am sure that will get better, but my hitting has improved. I also got my first real boo boo last night, trying to catch a pop up. I was running out to it and tripped on a hole, missed the ball, rammed my shin into the ground and slid on dry grass on top of it. Luckily, there was no blood, but my shin under my knee is swollen and really sore today. That is part of it. I probably would have bled had it happened on the field, but I would not have tripped on the uneven holey ground.

Well, I am soooo excited for the new season that is upon us. Our last game is Thanksgiving week. What an adventure.

Lots more stuff to talk about, but not right now.
Until we read again! wt

Yea me!

I rode my stationary bike today for 30minutes! I feel great too. I am reading this book and I read it while I was riding it. It makes the time go a lot quicker. It did not hurt that it wasn't flaming hot outside either! :-) I guess it is a start. I walked 2 miles last Thursday after I took the little ones to school. That was awesome too. I did 1mile in 13 minutes and the second mile in 11minutes. My goal with that will be to walk be to eventually bring it down, but I think it is a good start.

Until we read again...wt

Busy Busy Busy

Today at Church, it was brought to our attention that that we are always in a hurry. It is funny how God throws things at you, just when you need it because it is soooo true. Everywhere I go, I feel rushed. I rush through life and rush through my shows, rush through homework with my kids, even rush through mowing the lawn because rain was coming today, (which by the way, it ended up not even raining at our house!) A month or so ago, I was driving behind someone who was going slow (the speed limit) on our back country road and heard my 3 year old say, "C'mon DUDE!" It was a slap in the face. How many times must she have heard me say that? A few days ago, she said it again. I realized that, not only am I rushing all the time, my girls are watching and learning from me to be busy bodies. Before church this morning, my husband realized that he is basically booked up all week this week. Working all day, then softball games/practices, house church, it seems the list goes on. How is it that in life today we are keep ourselves so busy that we don't have time to sit down and relax or take care of ourselves. I complain all the time about how overweight I am. I could make time for that, my heart wants to make time for that, but I don't. My head makes up excuses and my limbs follow suit.
I am not really sure where I am going with this post, but alas to ponder, why are we so busy and what can I do to make a difference so my kids don't grow up running their lives away, in a hurry, like I do. C'mon Dude!

Until we read again! wt

Welcome to the Wonderful World of Wendy

Today is day number one of my blog. Welcome to my world. I will share some of my thoughts during the life of this blog. How long it will last, only God knows. I will use this as a vent to let out some of that exhaust that seems to build up in the Wonderful World of Wendy. Expect to hear a lot about my lovely T girls, (since they did get the star name of the blog) and some of my trials and tribulations that my life will bring me to and God will bring me through. I am hoping to use this as my accountability too. I want to lose some weight and I found that being held accountable is helpful, so this will be my anonymous way of doing that. Thanks for following me on my way.

wt